You can call them Christmas babies, birthday elves or even a snow creature, but the way they feel about when they were born is almost all the same.

The kids born in December—specifically the ones born right around Christmas—have arguably the worst birthdays of the year. Considering I have 17 years of frustration around the time that snow falls, I believe I’m the best of any to preach.

Your friends don’t want to do anything because they want to have as much time as possible with their new presents. This is frustrating for the December babies, because friends make birthdays so much better.

Arguably the biggest issue with having a late December birthday is the availability of family. Personally, this is an issue for me especially because my birthday is conveniently on Dec. 26. Relatives are worn out from Christmas and their kids, so they aren’t able to join me on my birthday.

Due to Christmas, many businesses are closed which makes it so difficult to find fun things to do for December babies. We don’t have the luxury of being able to decide whether or not we want a beach party or to have all of our friends around to play basketball. We don’t have the decision to be inside or outside for our day. Well you do, but you have to be very brave: something I very much am not.

Not to mention you’re, metaphorically, placed in the backseat by a lot of people. When it comes to our birthdays, they’re never as important as Christmas is. Our birthdays are never actually on the day of our birth if it’s after Christmas. It always gets squished together with Christmas, which gives people the option to give you one present for both occasions, which is beyond traumatic for a little kid.

Don’t get me started with getting your way. When it comes to doing what you want, it can’t create conflict with the Christmas plan. With it being “the jolliest time of the year,” family members really seem to beat a dead horse with the Christmas music for the entire month of December—it’s overkill. There’s no feeling like your family singing “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” instead of “Happy Birthday.”

I’m not trying to be a Grinch by hating on the season. I’m just trying to express the frustration that having a birthday in December brings down the chimney. It can be extremely lackluster and infuriating. So next time you see one of your December buddies, give them a pat on the back and tell them it’s ok.