It’s that time of year when high school seniors run around neighborhoods shooting each other in the back with Nerf guns, competing to win a cash prize.
Senior Assassins is a game that is more than just about aiming these Nerf guns; it’s a senior pastime about bringing a community of graduating students together to enjoy their last moments. If you want to win your high school senior assassin competition, these are all the tips you need.
Take out a loan:
Hire six bodyguards to defend you on all sides, blocking the occasional Nerf bullet when assassins run up on you. While you’re at it, also hire a private investigator to stalk your opponents, revealing their daily routine and allowing you to corner them when they least expect it. To finish your roster, bribe your teachers so you can leave school early, and allow you to escape school.
Appearance:
Completely change your appearance to avoid being detected by the opposition. Get facial surgery every round, so nobody knows what you look like each time. New cheekbones, new jawline, new teeth, you name it, really embody the quote “new week, new me.”
Relocate:
Rent an Airbnb for 2 months and move in with your team across town. To maximize your chances of winning, go incognito and ensure nobody knows your location.
Find the nearest trash can and throw your phone in there, and instead get a burner phone to avoid location tracking. This is the best way to remain hidden and untraceable.
Personality:
Become unpredictable so even your friends don’t know what you’re up to. On that note, be willing to sell out even your own teammates if they are slacking off and keeping the team down, cut off what is not needed.
Creative Mode:
Change up your daily routine – if you go to one gym location, switch up completely and go to a different one. If you’re feeling extreme, then skip school entirely (just kidding) and spend your time planning on “assassinating” your next targets.
Instead of putting yourself at risk and walking to your car at the end of the day, call an Uber to be picked up right by the entrance.
If you follow these tips you will definitely make it to the final round.
Disclaimer: This article is purely for entertainment purposes and should not be taken seriously.
