Bathrooms do not have a reputation for cleanliness. After all, it is where everyone has to go at some point to do their unspeakable business every day.
However, there is something especially abhorrent about boys’ bathrooms in public spaces. Any man who’s been to one before likely has a horror story about one.
DGS is a public space, and as such goes through all the abuse a regular public men’s bathroom experiences. Whether it be the bathrooms connected to the locker rooms or the regular bathrooms: the average DGS bathroom has a unifying element of disorder.
There will likely be trash on the floor or on the sink. For some reason, boys like to grab a helping of toilet paper, douse it in water, and throw the wet globs on the wall, or just leave them in the sink.
There are also other places where boys leave their trash. For example, the toilets.
Personally, I have seen many bags of chips shoved into the toilet—especially family-sized bags. There’s also plenty of other trash shoved or dropped into the toilet, like plastic water bottles, plastic bags, pencils/pens, and insane amounts of toilet paper.
The locker room bathrooms are also just the most delightful experience. And by “delightful” I, of course, mean obnoxious.
Thought your time spent changing in and out of your gym clothes was too quiet? Don’t worry, somebody will eventually save your experience by screaming, banging on the lockers, and/or making some kind of other inappropriate noise.
If the regular locker rooms aren’t enough, then might I introduce you to something called the pool locker room?
It’s like obnoxious teenage boy behavior is turned all the way up to ten in these locker rooms. The chorus of “Guys, I’m changing, don’t look!”, “Don’t be gay guys!” and other phrases are enough to turn any sane man into a wild, raving sewer prophet who has a posse of rats following him at all times.
There are other issues related to DGS’ bathrooms outside of student behavior. For example, the bathrooms that are locked during resource/lunch periods. Those kinds of small bathrooms in the Commons? They’re obviously safe to use in accordance with DGS’ board of bathroom time.
The bathrooms right next to the tech support desk are not allowed to be used by people coming from the commons. Despite being potentially more convenient(especially if you’re coming from the library), more clean, and having supervision by tech support from outside, you’re technically not allowed to use them if you’re coming from the Commons during lunch periods.
Some teachers actually enjoy being nice and they might shrug it off. Others believe the rules of DGS’ bathrooms were written in blood, and that it is their sacred duty to inconvenience all students by enforcing these rules.
What about the West Events entrance?
The school made nice, new bathrooms over there that virtually no one can use during regular school hours. To the student, the West Events entrance bathrooms are a mythical object that only reveals itself to the worthy.
All of this needless policing of student potty time can tell us one thing: George Orwell was absolutely right, authoritarianism is an incredibly easy vice to fall for.
